where i write 'box' far too many times.

Today I sorted out a bunch of the toys Henry is too old for and put them in an empty diaper box.  He has a toy box in the living room that is exploding with toys and I know he doesn't play with all of them anymore and I wanted to make room in case he gets one or two or twenty new toys on his birthday.  I was still trying to figure out where I am going to store the box of old toys when Henry woke from his nap so I just left the box in the living room.  He came out and as we were playing, he decided to climb on top of the box in order to get to the cat on the couch.  The box buckled under his weight and he kept sliding off but he kept trying.  Pretty soon the box started to tear and fall apart. 

Imagine my horror when I heard these words escape my lips:
"Oh Henry!  You are destroying mommy's box.  Please stop shredding my box, I don't have another box to put the toys in!"

I stopped.  Thought about what I said and just about died laughing.  Henry stopped climbing and just looked at me like I was batshit insane. 

Then I tried to explain that he wasn't in trouble or anything and that since I had a c-section he didn't really destroy my box and yes, it's true, I don't have another box but it's okay because mommy's box is just fine. 

And then I laughed some more and he took off to play in the street.

happy halloween!

I haven't been this excited about Halloween in a very long time.  When I lived in Detroit it was almost stressful because it didn't matter how many ginormous bags of candy I bought at Costco, I was going to run out.  Also, leaving my house pretty much open for several hours at night was a little unsettling.  I mean, kids in costumes.  You just never know.  They might ask for candy or something.  I know, I'm an asshole. 

Henry must have also been excited about Halloween because he actually took an afternoon nap when I wanted him to so he would be awake for trick-or-treating.  It was a Halloween miracle!

Here we are practicing trick-or-treating.  We don't get very many trick-or-treaters, hence the full size candy bars.  I know he looks annoyed but it's just because he is so advanced that he didn't need to practice and just wanted to hit the road. 

We had a great time and got to see lots of the neighbors and kids and it was a perfect night for trick-or-treating.

This is Henry saying, "Really, mom?  Gluten free cheese crackers?" as he was checking out his loot.  I guess those are the 2011 version of the popcorn balls of my childhood.  Henry is already starting to learn life's difficult lessons. 

i have been a bad mom.

My good camera is broken and I haven't taken as many photos as I probably should have and it makes me sad.  So I've been trying to make up for it by taking at least a photo every day.  In the meantime, I know I haven't posted many photos here so I'll try to catch up.  Here's a couple from September...

I especially like this one because you can see his two bottom teeth. 

big day.

It was a big day of firsts around here today.  First trick-or-treating.  First hair cut.  First scary movie marathon while napping on the couch with Uncle D. 

I know all I talk about is how tired I am but holy shitballs, Batman, mama is walking dead right now.  I would love to go to bed right now but first I have to post photos of such an amazing day with Henry.  Then I have to read the library book that was due today and I scandalously did not return it because I'm not done reading it!  I know the right thing to do would have been to just return the book and check it out again later but here's the thing... I tried to renew it online but I can't because someone else placed a hold on it.  And I was supposed to get the book at the end of September because I placed a hold on it and I didn't get it until a couple weeks ago because someone didn't return it when they were supposed to.  At least that's what I thought until when I really looked at the book, I realized it is brand spanking new.  So why should I return the book on time when the library will just buy a new one for the next person that has the hold?

No.  I don't really believe that will actually happen which is why I will stay up late tonight trying to finish the book so I can return it tomorrow and it will be there to be handed off to the next person on Monday morning.

Whatever.  I know you're only here for the photos of my kid and not for my library existential crisis.

We started off our morning with this beautiful sunrise.  Oh wait, no we didn't.  We started off our morning at 5 a.m. when it was pitch black.  Then we took a nap at 6 a.m. and got up again at 8 and then we saw this beautiful sunrise.  What?  I'm not bitter. 

We met my sister-in-law and her kids and headed to their local mall for some trick-or-treating hell just because you know, I loooooove huge crowds of screaming kids all on sugar highs.  Henry's cousin, Jonas, wanted to push Henry in the stroller but his mom wouldn't share.  We're working with her on this sharing concept.  I'll let you know how it goes.  

The mall has a carousel and Henry's g-pa sent money along with me to make sure the kids got to ride.  The carousel was in the food court which was also where the costume contest was taking place which meant all of the screaming sugar high kids were in one place with mingling fast food greasy odors.  Luckily the screaming brats didn't care about the carousel so we had it almost all to ourselves.  I get motion sick pretty easily but I have never had a problem on carnival rides or any kind of rides until today I realized that I hadn't ever been on a carnival ride inside a building.  I normally wouldn't post such an awful photo of myself but this pretty much sums up how I felt.  And the photo makes me laugh and I never want to pass up an opportunity to laugh.  

Henry had a long day which was mostly his fault because instead of napping, he would lay in his pack n play and SCREAM bloody murder until someone went and rescued him.  He finally fell asleep on the couch and when I went to get him later he and his Uncle D were watching scary movies.  Well, his uncle was watching scary movies and Henry was facing the other way making faces and blowing raspberries at his uncle.  Because it was such a long day I didn't think we would have time to cut his hair but I'm pretty sure his loooong hair was driving his aunt coconuts so she decided to cut it after he ate dinner.  I'm glad she did because he really was getting the beginnings of an SABM (Sweet Ass Baby Mullet).  This is the before...

 This is the during...

And oh.  Sorry.  You have to wait for an after photo!  I was in such a hurry to pack stuff up and hit the road to head home, I didn't get an after photo with just Henry and I'm not sure his aunt, uncle, cousins and their dogs would be so happy with me posting their photos.  He did really well during the haircut and didn't cry at all!  And I know it seems difficult to imagine but he is even more handsome than he was before.  Awwwww...

Shit.  Pretend you didn't see that other photo with Henry's cousins.  I'm too tired to go back and photoshop them out. 

baseball and religion

Me: Josh Hamilton said God told him he'd hit a 2-run homer last night.

My dad: Did God also tell him they'd lose the game?

Me: Nope. Dad, don't you know the lord works in mysterious ways?

something i miss about my past life that i never considered i would miss.

Cooking.

I miss cooking.

I had a great kitchen.  There was lots of room.  I had lots of spices and crap to cook with and an internet full of recipes to try.

Most of the time I was frustrated by cooking for two, there were always way too many leftovers and cooking just seemed like an awful lot of work for just the two of us.  My kitchen stuff is in boxes in the basement and I miss it.  My parents cook almost all of the meals for us which is great because I'm busy chasing Henry and playing and having fun.  Even if I do cook, it isn't the same because I am using their stuff and it's old and it's not the same as my stuff and I find myself looking forward to having my own kitchen again. 

I think if I had my own kitchen tomorrow, I would make spicy macaroni and cheese.  It was one of my favorites.  I'm too lazy/tired to find the recipe and link to it right now but maybe I'll do that tomorrow and someone out there can make it.

Yummmmmmmm!!!!

wait. one more thing.

My epidural site has been hurting more and more every day.  Is this normal?  I would go see a doctor but I'm about to lose my health insurance and I don't want to find out I'm about to be paralyzed and not be able to do anything about it.

It's a good thing Henry is the best kid ever or I'd be really pissed that the stress I was under when growing him in my uterus and then getting him out of my uterus and then raising him alone has wrecked my body.  I have never been so unhealthy in my life.  Ugh.

sick.

Henry is sick.  I am getting sick.

I'm not having any fun.

well, duh.

This afternoon I walked in the kitchen and my mom had Henry on her lap and they were playing with a calculator.  I asked how the math lesson was going and my mom said, "We aren't doing math.  We're texting.  Just because our phone isn't as fancy as your phone doesn't mean what we have to say isn't important."
 

another post about sleep. i mean no sleep.

I hear every noise Henry makes during the night, usually I'm still awake because of the crazy bad insomnia but when I am asleep, I sit up and wait to figure out whether or not I need to go in and soothe him or if he can do it himself.  Last night I actually fell asleep earlier than usual and was a little frustrated when I heard him start to cry at 1 a.m.  It was one of his more desperate cries and I knew that if I waited too long, he'd wake up all the way and it'd be difficult to get him back to sleep.  I went and grabbed a clean pacifier and by the time I went in his room, he was starting to stand up in his crib.  I stuck the pacifier in his mouth and picked him up to give him a cuddle (I usually don't do this because I don't want him to think he's always going to get cuddles if he cries!).  He wasn't really awake, just kind of awake.  I was kind of frustrated because I was so tired I could hardly stand up.  Then, as he snuggled under my chin he started whispering, "mom-mom-mom," which wasn't so easy to do with a pacifier in his mouth.  He reached up to stroke my hair and fell asleep and I wished I could stand there with him in my arms forever.