another post about sleep. i mean no sleep.

I hear every noise Henry makes during the night, usually I'm still awake because of the crazy bad insomnia but when I am asleep, I sit up and wait to figure out whether or not I need to go in and soothe him or if he can do it himself.  Last night I actually fell asleep earlier than usual and was a little frustrated when I heard him start to cry at 1 a.m.  It was one of his more desperate cries and I knew that if I waited too long, he'd wake up all the way and it'd be difficult to get him back to sleep.  I went and grabbed a clean pacifier and by the time I went in his room, he was starting to stand up in his crib.  I stuck the pacifier in his mouth and picked him up to give him a cuddle (I usually don't do this because I don't want him to think he's always going to get cuddles if he cries!).  He wasn't really awake, just kind of awake.  I was kind of frustrated because I was so tired I could hardly stand up.  Then, as he snuggled under my chin he started whispering, "mom-mom-mom," which wasn't so easy to do with a pacifier in his mouth.  He reached up to stroke my hair and fell asleep and I wished I could stand there with him in my arms forever.