come home, moon.

Everyone is gone.  My parents went to visit friends for a few days and Henry went to visit his dad until January 1.  I was supposed to go visit a friend but instead we decided to take a few days to figure out what we are doing.  It's time to decide to shit or get off the pot, I suppose.  What does that mean for me? 

Extreme quiet.

I just took the clock off the wall because the tick tocking was driving me coconuts.  It's so quiet I almost miss the wailing of Barbaro Garbey.  Almost. 

Last night Henry and I looked for the moon.  It was behind a cloud and Henry was most disappointed that we had turned off all the lights in the house and still couldn't see it.  I could tell it wasn't a big cloud so I told him we'd probably be able to see it soon.  We stood at the window for a few seconds and Henry said, "Moon.  Come home, moon."  And then lo and behold, the moon came out from behind the cloud.  He had big smiles and I had big smiles and I told him the moon came home just for him. 

I love this kid and can't wait for 2013.  I know big things are in store for us.  He just needs to come home.

merry christmas eve.

I'm sitting here at the table listening to Henry "wash" dishes in the sink.  He would stand at that sink all day if I let him.  Since it's almost Christmas, he gets to play in the water longer than usual.  I have been looking forward to Christmas my entire life but now that it is here I find myself exhausted and wanting to skip all of it.  At the same time, I am looking forward to sharing all the excitement that Christmas morning brings with Henry.  Unfortunately, he is sick so I'm not sure we should go around family and friends and infect everyone with what he has.  It might be nice to have Christmas, just the two of us.  We are beginning many family traditions, he and I, maybe this could be the beginning of another. 

Henry found the soap so I have to go clean up before we both slip on the floor and kill ourselves. 

Merry merry merry and bright!

family portraits.

smart.

When Henry wants a piggy back ride, he comes up to me and says, "backpack."

i'm almost asleep.

But I found another photo of Henry and the tree shadows that I love.  Henry is a very thoughtful kid and even though he laughs easily, he is often concentrating on something.  Lots of people think he's a really serious kid and I think in some ways he is.  I worry that the last few months he was in my uterus all I did was cry and not eat and not sleep and that somehow made him more serious than a little kid should be.  Then again, in a lot of other ways he's just like his mom-mom and is constantly finding things to laugh about.  Like this afternoon when he pushed me off the couch then laughed so hard he almost fell off the couch himself.  I'll never know if the shitty environment I provided for him during the last trimester of my pregnancy affected him negatively but what I do know is that I will always love this kid and I will always try to do what I think is best for him so he is happy and healthy and finds his way in this crazy fucked up world.  Anyway, in this photo he appears to be deep in thought about something.  My guess is he was trying to figure out how to get out of taking a nap.  Smart boy.

it's friday, bitches.

What does that mean for you?  Hitting the bar?  Working late?  Going to dinner and a movie? 

What does that mean for me?

I'm going to bed at 8 and sleeping until Henry wakes up hopefully twelve hours after that.  People.  I'm finally sleeping and I can't stop sleeping.  Not enough hours in the day to get sleep.  All I do is sleep.  Henry figured his out and has decided he doesn't need to nap anymore.  I tried to tell him that his daddy thinks he still needs to nap but apparently he doesn't care because he doesn't nap more than he naps.  I'm sure it's something I'm doing wrong.  Maybe it's because I need to sleep all.  the.  time.  I can't do anything right!

Here's a photo of my oh-so-cute son from October 2011.  Oh that face!

happy october.

It's been crazy warm the past few days so we've been spending as much time as possible outside.  I hate the short days but I love the southern sun and the shadows across the lawn.

Yesterday Henry helped his Gpa cut the grass.

And today he helped wash the car.

It's the last hurrah and it's going to be cold again tomorrow.  We have lots of plans for the next week.  Most importantly, we'll be practicing trick-or-treating.  Henry has his costume and he's taking his own sweet time getting used to it.  Hopefully he'll be ready by Monday, which I know, is not Halloween, but there is an event we're going to that will involve costumes.  For him.  Not me.  Why are all adult women costumes slutty something?  Slutty everything? 

I'll be sure to post photos after Halloween. 

p.s.  he can say "Gesundheit!"  kind of.  a little bit. 

detroit tigers. roar.

The Tigers won some big game tonight.  I missed most of it because Henry wanted to play outside.  Just because missing the game wasn't painful enough, he insisted on playing with his MSU basketball that a very kind neighbor gave him this week.  I was hoping to put the basketball on a very high shelf because the basketball has autographs but the neighbor insisted Henry play with the ball.  Henry loves it.  I love this photo because it kind of makes me think Henry is shitting out an MSU basketball. 

Henry also loves to play in another neighbor's flower bed.  Here's a photo from this morning.  He was actually trying to hide from me because I always make him get out of the flower bed. 

But back to tonight.  He crawled into the flower bed again and I took this video.  A different neighbor's teeny tiny chihuahua was running around yapping at full speed.



The video cut out at the end because I ran out of memory on my phone.  Ooops.  So what you missed was Henry telling me his hands were dirty and he refused to get up until I dried his hands and wiped away all the dirt.  I can't stop laughing at this kid. 

We made it back inside for the end of the game and then I missed more because he needed a bath but we were all done in time to watch the bottom of the 8th and most of the top of the 9th.  We missed a couple minutes because Henry was really really tired and he fell and slightly barely bumped his head but oh.  my.  god.  you would have thought he had a concussion.  He pulled his shit together in time for the last out.  We celebrated for a minute and I started to tell him all about 2006 but then I realized it was weird because that is one of those real/fake memories from my life before Henry so I backed off telling him about it.  It's weird for me to think about.  My life from mid-2003 to August 15, 2010 feels like it was all a bunch of lies and bullshit and I am very disconnected from it all.  Anyway, point is, Henry and I got to party and dance around the house and Henry played with his broom in honor of this series and it was amazing.

Then he said, "night night" and went to bed.

LET'S GO TIGERS!!  

i'm still here.

Still in denial.  I've received bad news before.  I know I'll be okay.  Things are just a little crazier than usual right now. 

Henry is great.  Henry is better than great.  He is hilarious and talking more every day.  Tonight, in the middle of his bath he gave me a big hug and kiss.  I'm not sure why and I'm pretty sure I don't care.  It was wonderful and just what I needed.

We raked leaves today although Henry mostly raked where there were no leaves and then ran to the piles and jumped in even though they were soaking wet.  Yay!

i. give. up.

I got some really bad news this afternoon.  My new coping mechanism is to curl up into fetal position as much as possible, pull the blanket over my head and go to sleep.  I know there is baseball to watch.  I hear there is some kind of debate going on right now.  But guess what?  I don't give a fuck because this news I got today, it's bad.  I'm just going to sleep until Henry's singing and counting down and beeping and jumping wakes me up tomorrow morning.  Insomnia, you've got nothing on me and my new coping plan.  

I just need everything to stop, please. 

And I also need the Tigers to win so I can watch them later because I can't watch now. 

amen.

We pray before meals.  Usually.  Sometimes.  Henry knows how to fold his hands and he bows his head a little and most of the time I'm watching him and trying not to laugh.  Tonight, however, I completely lost my shit during an impromptu prayer.  In the middle of dinner, Henry folded his hands, bowed his head and said, "COOKIE" as he glanced up at me to see my reaction.  So.  Funny.

This was taken during a trip to the cider mill.  There was a little playhouse that Henry loved running in and out of.  I peeked in to see what he was up to and came across this scene.  Again, completely lost my shit laughing so hard. 

things i learned today.

• Today I decided to try to tell Henry all the words I know that refer to testicles.  There are a lot of words that refer to testicles.  I know a lot of them and I'm sure there are many more.  I never knew how many words I know that refer to testicles.  
• It has been cold and I have been cold all day.  Long sleeve shirt, two sweatshirts and a down jacket.  Still cold.  Having the perfect cuddle person at the end of the day to warm up with makes it all okay.
• Someday Henry is probably going to get kicked out of preschool for teaching his friends all the different words for testicles.  I won't know whether to be mortified or proud.  Who am I kidding.  We all know what I'll be.
• I didn't learn very much today.

the end.

After many many months of complaining that Henry doesn't really talk that much, I can stop.  He, however, cannot stop.  Talk talk talk.  That is all he does.  Oh wait, he talks and then laughs.  Sometimes he for real laughs and sometimes he totally mocks my laugh which makes me laugh and then he mocks me some more.  It's been a blast but also really scary because I have a little bit of a potty mouth and oooooh boy.  I'm gonna be in trouble if I don't knock it off.  Who am I kidding.  I'm already in trouble.

Is it wrong that I'm terribly disappointed that when he says, "truck," it actually sounds like, "truck?"

This afternoon my friend was reading him one of his favorite books and at the end Henry slammed the book shut and yelled, "THE END!"  He's been quietly saying, "the end" at the end of stories for a few days now but oh my GOD this new story ending is hilarious and joyful and wonderful and the best part is he wants to hear the same story over and over again so there was lots of screaming THE END today and oooooh even though this parenting thing is crazy difficult and stressful, it is the most hilarious and heartwarming and fun thing I have ever and will ever do. 

THE END!

My plans for the weekend have changed once again.  Instead of spending time with a good friend and his family, I am home trying to not cry from my back pain.  There was no way I could drive for 2.5 hours and not die.  Okay, maybe I'm being a bit dramatic but I am in a lot of pain tonight.  Ugh.  Henry is with his dad, which is good and bad.  Good because my back will get some rest and hopefully I will feel better tomorrow and can start exercising so this doesn't happen anymore.  Bad because this isn't his dad's weekend and I miss him terribly.  Henry doesn't get to see his dad very much so I feel like if his dad is in town for the weekend and has time for him, I have to let him go.  Ah the joys of parenting.  It's not about me, it's about the boy.  I have never been so happy to have it not be about me.  Except I miss him.  A lot. 

This week has been tough on me.  A classmate from high school was killed in a motorcycle accident.  The daughter of another classmate from high school passed away later that same day.  I know I should be grateful for everything I have and for the most part, I am.  There are some days, however, like today, when I can't stop thinking about the disappointment and hurt and pain.  I am sad about the bullshit I have been through.  I am sad for my friends. 

I keep thinking about the first thing I told Henry right after he was born.  Henry and I were left alone in the operating room for a few moments after he was born and it was just the two of us.  I know he doesn't remember my words but I remember them and I live them and someday I will remind him and he will understand and we'll both be okay.

I know.  Rambling tonight.  Let's blame it on the pain. 

Here's a family photo from this afternoon.  I could hardly sit or stand today because of the pain shooting down my back and leg, but damn we had an amazing day. 

rewind.

I'd like to pretend today didn't happen.  It started out bad.  Got a little better.  Then got worse.  Then got worse.  Then got worse. 

Henry isn't two yet but he is all two.  He is bigger than an average two-year-old yet wants to be carried around like a not-yet-two-year-old.  My back aches so bad by the end of the day I can hardly stay vertical.  He throws tantrums like a kid stuck at two for the past twenty years.  He's that good.  He also rebounds from these tantrums like nothing ever happened.

So much like Henry pretends the kicking screaming kicking screaming kicking screaming never happened, I'm going to pretend today didn't happen. 

Except for when Henry hugged me and kissed my nose and patted my head and said "love mom-mom."  I would like to do that again, please. 

connisseur.

I.  Love.  Bendy.  Straws.

This morning Henry and I went out for breakfast and ended up at Bob Evans (the lack of suitable breakfast places on this end of town is astounding).  Henry got some milk and it came with the most amazing bendy straw I have ever seen.  The bendy part was at least twice as long as usual and I fell in love.  Proof that I love this kid more than anything:  I didn't steal it from him. 

I just did some bendy straw googling because I need these straws and it appears I am not the only person fond of these Bob Evans bendy straws.  Someone shared their personal story and it had something to do with asking some Bob Evans manager where they got their fantastic straws and the kind manager gave her a box of them for free so I guess I could try to get some that way but that sounds like a lot of work.  Also, what are the chances there will be another nice manager like that?  And what if they give me a box and then get fired?  The economy.  It's all my fault.  My need for kick ass bendy straws.  Anyway, I found some on Amazon but I'm not sure if they are the same thing and really, do I need to spend $20 on 960 bendy straws?

I'm going to do the responsible thing and try to go to sleep before placing my order in the morning.

Seriously.  They are awesome.  I should have taken pictures.  I should have taken the thing with me and raised it as my own. 

i was wrong.

Henry didn't get much sleep this weekend and last night he slept for FIFTEEN HOURS.  15.  Ten + Five.  6:30 p.m. to 9:30 a.m.  He probably would have slept longer but after 15 hours I was worried he was dead so I went in and he stirred and I snuck back out but then a few minutes later he woke up for good.  I am pretty sure this is the second time since he's been with me that I've gotten up and eaten breakfast before him.  Crazy.  I'm pretty sure the first time was when I was sick and couldn't sleep anyway. 

But it gets better.

He napped this afternoon.  For just over TWO HOURS.  Which is just over an hour longer than usual. 

But it gets even better.

He went to bed at his normal bedtime and went to sleep.  

We're going to stay out late every other night from now on. 

life.

I have no life.  Social life, that is.  This is my choice.  My kid has always needed to go to bed early and I choose to be home in time for him to get a good night of sleep.  There are times that we are out of town and come home late but for the most part, I plan on being home in time for him to go to bed when he's tired.  He now sucks at sleeping in the car so we used to be able to plan on car time as sleep time but that hasn't worked in a while.  My friends often try to get me out for the evening and ask, "Can't your parents watch Henry?" My answer is usually the same, of course they can watch him.  Of course they would watch him if I asked them to.  Here's the thing.  I chose to have Henry in my life.  I chose to get pregnant.  I chose to parent him.  I did not choose to have him so I could go on living the life I had before he was born.  I know that having to be home by 6 every night is pathetic and lame.  But I also know that it is what is best for my son.  It is what makes him happy and healthy and such an easy going kid.  He knows what to expect.  The structure and security I have provided for him have been good decisions on my part.  Someday I will have a social life again.  I look forward to it but at the same time, I have no regrets.  Henry is amazing and I know that I will always do what is best for him.  It's not about being a martyr.  It's about loving my life with Henry in it.  The other bullshit I have to deal with is nothing compared to getting to have a happy and healthy son in my life.  With him, the sky's the limit.  

sexting.

I don't believe in sexting because you never know when you might be having an affair and then you lie about it on the stand and then poof!  The whole world can read your text messages.  The whole world includes your spouse you are cheating on. 

Can you tell I worked for City Council when there was Kwame Kilpatrick drama?

I also don't believe in sexting because I suck at text messaging.  Ever since the iphone came into my life, I SUCK at getting the text message to the correct recipient.  I'm sure it isn't all the iphone's fault and has more to do with the fact that I am always having to have one eye on Henry while I'm texting and washing the dishes and sweeping the floor and whatever else is happening.  My iphone came along when Henry was a few months old. 

Anyway.

Today I accidentally sexted someone.  Henry played in my car for a long time this morning, longer than usual because I didn't get any sleep last night and didn't have the energy to find a more productive way to spend our time.  When he plays in the car he likes to have everything on at the same time.  Lights, radio, hazards, blinkers, etc...  After a while I realized I should probably try to start the car.  Nothing but  click click.  I decided to let him play for a while longer even though we were supposed to meet up with a friend and there wasn't another car around.  I figured I'd text message my friend and he could come over to rescue us.  I texted him about my car battery being dead and I figured he'd write back and offer to help.  I waited and waited and the battery was getting deader and deader and I didn't hear back so I sent another message that read, "so can you come over and jump me?" not even thinking about it sounding dirty because by that time I was making Henry's lunch while doing laundry and I was getting worried that my friend was waiting for us and would be pissed that we weren't there. 

Oh the confused texts after that were maddening and hysterical and there was lots of, "I thought we decided we'd just be friends?" and "huh??" and "what are you talking about?" and then I got a text message from Henry's dad about alternators and auto parts stores and ooooooooh.  Shit.  I accidentally sent the original dead battery text to Henry's dad.

I decided I need an intern to proof read my text messages.  Scratch that... I need an intern to just send my text messages for me.  If they accidentally sext someone on my behalf, they will not pass the class.

Did I mention I didn't get any sleep last night?

and another thing...

I swore I wouldn't watch Dr. Who before bed anymore because oh my GOD the dreams!  If I'm lucky enough to actually fall asleep, my messed up time traveling, alien beings dreams wake me up several times.  Unfortunately, I can't stop watching.

Also, my phone charger died and I'm too poor/lazy to go buy another one so I have to charge my phone in the car.  Henry loves it because he thinks it's an invitation to play in the car.  He now knows how to properly load and eject CDs.  And he can't get enough of Milk and Sugar by the Hard Lessons.



The CD version is much more balls out rock and roll.  And the bass.  Henry loves the bass. 

badass.

i almost forgot.

Recent photos of my boy!

Here mom-mom, have a leaf.  As my friend pointed out, so meta.

I love this shirt.  Here's the back.

sad happy. happy sad.

Today I had lunch with some very close friends and their young daughter.  Henry didn't join us, he was busy sleeping.  Must be nice.  Anyway, I had a blast and we laughed and talked and played and it was wonderful.  And it made me really really sad because today I realized that I don't have any close friends in Lansing.  Shit, I barely have friends in Lansing.  I would give anything to have friends like this to hang out with on a regular basis.  Logistically, this would most likely not happen very much anyway since Henry goes to bed at 7 which makes socializing difficult, especially when he isn't with me every other weekend.  But the idea of having close friends with kids close by makes my heart ache. 

Instead, I struggle to have the confidence to meet new people.  I am embarrassed that they might find out I am living with my parents and I shudder to think they will find out why.  Things that I find hilarious and make me feel happy and funny, other moms find offensive and weird.  This is the one thing I feel hasn't changed since having Henry.  I still find really inappropriate shit really funny.  Apparently this isn't okay with other mothers.

When I do get to see my friends, I still get tinges of sadness and jealousy watching them with their children.  I don't have any single parent friends.  I thought I would be able to connect with other single mothers but I quickly realized that most of them are busy working and aren't as lucky as me to get to be a stay-at-home mom.  Instead, I hang out with all the married moms whose husbands are at work.  These feelings of sadness and jealousy definitely don't keep me from hanging out with my friends as much as possible.  It just means a lot of planning and a lot of driving.

I know I shouldn't complain because I have amazing people in my life.  My friends stood by me and up for me and around me during the most difficult time of my life and made sure I was safe and healthy and felt loved.  Truthfully, these are things that I don't really think about all that often.  Just every once in a while.  And definitely after such a wonderful afternoon with friends that I miss so much and rarely get to enjoy.     

reunited and it feels so...

Exhausting.

Henry and I went to our family reunion today.  He had a blast which makes all the hard work on my plate worth it.  I guess. 

I've been struggling with a lot of things lately:
Mistakes I've made and lessons learned, if any.
Finding a balance between not wanting Henry to miss out on anything because I'm a single mom and saying no to doing things that just aren't realistic as a single parent family. 

I have more to say about these things but tonight I'm really tired.  I'm not even sure I'm making sense because I might have washed down some Benadryl with a bloody mary a while ago.  Huh. Who knows.

Henry and I went to the county fair this past week.  I was kind of sad the license plate selection was waaaaaaay bigger than the belt buckle selection.  

Henry got to see the baby chicks but the big sign said, "DON'T TOUCH" so I didn't let him touch.

 Henry loved the petting zoo.  They actually had a really nice setup this year.  Lots of room to run around and lots of different animals.  Henry and I especially liked the alpaca.  So soft!  Too bad I didn't get a picture of it.  Henry isn't afraid of the animals which I think is good.  Oh.  Another thing I've been struggling with lately is that balance of wanting Henry to have a healthy fear of things, like strangers and strange animals and weird relatives and water, but not be afraid all the time of these things.  I don't know if I'm making sense anymore.  Time to read and pass out...

good days bad days.

I love staying home with Henry.  He is my very top priority and I will continue to do what I think is best for him.  The other day he and I were having a very serious conversation in the car and I told him, "Henry, I choose you." and he responded with a fake sneeze because he thinks "gesundheit" is hilarious.  Apparently he thinks I sneeze him. 

Staying home with Henry is also exhausting, demanding, and haaaaard.  Every day I am trying to think of new ways to entertain/teach a toddler stuff I think he should know.  How am I supposed to know what this kid needs to know?  Are there books on this subject or something?  Yeah.  Right.  Who has time to read? 

The past couple days have been really difficult because it has been hot outside, as in too hot to play outside hot.  Impression 5 doesn't have air conditioning which is so ridiculous I can't even believe anyone goes there in the summer.   I haven't gotten any sleep which is partly my fault (crazy worrier at night) and partly his fault (night terrors) and I find myself getting really frustrated really easily for much of the day.  I do my best to not take it out on Henry but by the time he goes to bed, I'm spent.  Nothing left.

Tonight I'm sitting here staring at my magazine, trying to take some "me" time, and all I can hear is Henry over the monitor (he's in bed) talking to himself and singing and cracking himself up.  Oh, and he meows too. 

It's taking everything I have in me to not go and get him out of bed so we can spend more time together.  That's how I know I love this job.  
 

i miss him.

what the what. again.

I knew it had been a while since I had a chance to sit in front of my computer but I didn't realize how long it had been until I just decided to check out my Google Reader.  Yeah.  The unread articles begin on May 11.  Sorry RSS, you can bite me.

Delete. 

Delete.

Delete.

Who needs news anyway?

what the what.

My son doesn't say much.  He tries out lots of words.  Once and then never again.  Yet.  I am proud to say that he has officially mastered the usage of "What the what?"  In the morning, I hear his pacifier fall on the floor.  Then I hear him say, "ah ooooo" which is his version of "uh-oh" (in other circumstances it also means "thank you").  A few seconds pass before he realizes nobody is there to pick it up for him and I hear, "wha a wha?" and I just know his hands are out to his sides, palms up.  Today one of his shoes fell off while he was playing on his slide.  "Ah ooo" and I was having a hard time getting his shoe back on his foot and he said, "wha a wha?" 

The past couple days have been hilarious.  He does so many new things every day and I can't stop laughing.  He has a favorite book that he looks at on his own and screams when he gets to the page where the elephant screams.  I could watch him read that book all day.

I do wish he would get over Yo Gabba Gabba and stop insisting he listen to it all day every day.  Luckily the weather has been nice so we are outside as much as possible.  I think tomorrow I am going to throw the CDs out the car window.  While speeding on the freeway.  I'll wait until Henry goes to sleep so he won't get the idea that it's okay to throw stuff out the window.  Or I'll explain to him that it's only okay to throw Yo Gabba Gabba CDs out the window.  The problem is that he is so damn smart, he'll probably understand everything I say. 

That's right, I've officially entered the My Son Is a Genius stage.

Feel free to stop reading.

ha ha just kidding.

Remember when I said I'm doing so much better this spring and not getting sick anymore?  I lied.  I seemed to have picked up Henry's cold which isn't a surprise since he was coughing right into my face the other night.  Normally I would move my face away from his coughing face but he was having a hard time catching his breath and it was dark so I was trying to see if he was struggling a little or a lot.  It was somewhere in between. 

The good news is that Henry is feeling better.  Since he only really got sick on Tuesday, I'm hoping my cold will also only be a couple days.  He's still having rough nights but at least his little nose is pretty much clear during the day.  I haven't slept in the past couple nights because I've been up with him and my little nose isn't clear during the day or at night. 

This afternoon Henry's gpa decided to teach Henry how to do some gardening.  It was great because Henry looooooooooves spending time with his gpa and I got a break to lay on the couch and not breathe out of my nose. 

Here is my little man getting ready to work...

Time to start filling up some pots with soil...

And then I went inside to chill for a little while.  I came back outside to check on the progress and oh.  my.  god.  Apparently Henry loves gardening and playing in the dirt and eating dirt and playing in the water.  He had decided to take a break in his car...

And back to work.  I don't know how many times I told him that wasn't a fork...

He was so tired at bedtime, he didn't even wave goodbye when I walked out of his room like he usually does.  I know he's stuffed up again tonight because I can hear him talking in his sleep.  He has to sleep tonight because I have to get some sleep or I'm never going to get better.  We have big plans this weekend so we have to be healthy.  I suppose in order for that to happen I should do a better job at stopping him from eating dirt instead of taking photos.  But doesn't he look happy??

spare tire.

me:  Henry and I have started walking/jogging because I have this spare tire I can't seem to get rid of without exercising.

her:  Spare tire?  What spare tire?  Oooooh I see it now.  You know how to cover it with your clothes don't ya...

Last year I bought a kickass used jogging stroller with plans to get into great shape, find a man and live happily ever after.  Then I couldn't get healthy and my dr. told me to knock it off with the jogging until I could start eating better and gained some weight and stopped getting sick.  At this year's dr. appointment she told me I could stop gaining weight.  Gee.  Thanks.  I was actually very happy to hear this.  I got out the jogging stroller and washed it up and thankfully, Henry looooooves it.  The other day we started out for a walk but it was raining so we turned around and went home.  He was really pissed when I took him out of the stroller and he kept signing for more.  This weekend when he was with his dad I bought a rain cover for the stroller and was actually excited that it started to rain today and I got to try it out.  Unfortunately, Henry didn't want to have anything to do with it and I decided it wasn't raining hard enough to make him miserable with the stupid thing.  I guess I spend so much time telling him it isn't cool to stick his head in a plastic bag that it's confusing when I try to stick his whole body along with the stroller in a giant plastic bag.  With air holes but whatever.  This whole drama occurred at about 3.10 miles.  I was feeling good.  We were making good time.  All was well with the world.  I put away the rain cover and we kept going.  About .25 miles later we were almost to the tree covered street where it wouldn't be as rainy and I noticed his right shoe was gone.  He just started wearing a bigger size shoe this weekend and since he was with his dad, I wasn't sure how it went, whether they actually stayed on his feet or not.  I stopped and looked all around the stroller and got the rain cover back out, wondering if maybe I had gathered up his shoe in the cover and nope, it wasn't there.  I stood there for a minute and tried to think of the last time I noticed he had both shoes and I thought they must have been there for the rain cover but who knows.  I considered just forgetting it and going home because we were still about a mile from home and what if it really started raining.  But then I remembered that I bought those stupid shoes for $7 on sale and they were brand new and what if I couldn't find them for that cheap again.  I turned around and sure enough, about .25 mile back, there was an adorable shoe laying in the road.

All this to say that tonight I am exhausted.  Who knew an extra .5 mile could kill me? 

And I love this tree.  I noticed it on the way back from finding his shoe. 

We have a long day planned for tomorrow.  I'm not sure there will be time for exercising but I'm going to try to make it happen.  This weekend I realized that we get lots of good talks in during these walks and when he wasn't with me, it just sucked.  Also, I'm getting really good at garage profiling.  I'm pretty sure I've found my next husband. 

And my spare tire is getting smaller.  Sweet!

dick points.

Me:  I need to sign up for the rewards program again.  After 18 months I just realized that my ex-husband has been getting the rewards from the card I've been using.  What a waste...

Employee:  Oh don't worry sweetie, you're not the only one that's happened to.  I like to buy sporting goods and one time I bought a bunch of camping equipment and I couldn't figure out why I didn't get any points.  Then I realized that my ex-husband got all the Dick points.  I was so mad.  Yup.  All those Dick points went to him.

Me:  Oh.  My.  God.  That's awesome.

Employee:  The worst part was that I wanted them points so I could buy a gun  

Me:  I think you are my people.

favorite time of today.

Henry and I have been going on long walks in the afternoon.  We talk and laugh and shout but when we get to this street we are quiet and listen to the birds and squirrels.  Perfect.

stink.

I often find myself calling Henry, "Stinker," and unfortunately, sometimes it gets shortened to "Stink."  Lately he hasn't been excited about getting his diaper changed and he runs and hides so sometimes Stink is appropriate.  And sometimes, he's just up to no good.

nice to meet you, tantrum. now go away.

This morning I watched in horror as my son screamed bloody murder and flung his body over his Elmo chair and onto the floor and screamed some more and writhed in what seemed like physical pain but what?  I don't remember kicking him in the teeth.  Oh.  That's because I didn't kick him in the teeth.  I did, however, tell him he could not bite my shoulder again.

It only lasted a couple minutes but I have a feeling it was just a glimpse of what is to come.  My sweet, sweet boy is normal!

In the end, he got up and wanted cuddles.  I reluctantly let him rest his head on my shoulder, the site of the original crime.  He put his head down, then lifted it up to give me a kiss and patted my ouch-y shoulder.

Sweet, sweet boy. 

cliche.

Every parent thinks their kid is the cutest.  I'm the only one that is correct.

Henry looooooooooves playing in his sandbox.  It got chilly again after that crazy warm spell in March so when he plays outside for a long time, he has to wear his hat.  It wasn't that cold on the day this photo was taken but Henry refused to play in the sandbox until he was wearing his hat.  His hair was soaked with sweat by the time he was done but he was so happy, he didn't care. 

conversation i never thought i would ever have with my child.

Henry likes to go to pet supply stores with me so he can watch the birdies and the hamsters and he especially likes the tropical fish.  Oh, and the boy loves turtles.  Turtles in books.  Turtles in the pond (real turtles).  Turtles in the bathtub (not real turtles).  

A couple weeks ago he went with me to a store to pick up some litter and other cat supplies.  We were looking at the hamsters and I noticed that one hamster cage was marked "males" and one was marked "females."  We were looking at the "females" because they were running around and playing even though it was the middle of the day.  Much to my surprise, as we were watching the "females," I heard the 70's porn music theme song in my head.  That's right, Henry.  Either a male snuck his way into the female cage or those are lesbians and oh.  my.  god.  They clearly like it rough.  Where did they get those whips and leather masks and handcuffs?  Okay, maybe not that rough.  It's possible that I have never seen hamster porn and that's not what they were doing at all.  But I've seen enough Animal Planet to be pretty sure we might as well have been in a dark skanky movie theater with other dirty hamsters.  Then I realized I was having this entire stream of thought.  Out loud.  While my son giggled at the lesbian (?) hamsters doing it. 

I was telling this story to his pediatrician yesterday (as you know, she also happens to be a good friend) and as she doubled over in laughter she said, "You know, Henry understands what you are saying and pretty soon he'll really understand. And someday you are going to get a call from his first grade teacher asking why Henry is telling his friends about hamster porn." 

At first this thought disturbed me and then what was more disturbing was I started to beam with pride and said, "That's my boy."

have i mentioned how awesome my kid is?

Henry came to cuddle with me in my bed at 5:45 a.m. today.  Then he snuggled in and we slept until 8:45 a.m.  I guess that's what happens after two full days of running and playing with cousins, aunts, and uncles. 

every day is a first.

So I have this awful insomnia because oh, I don't know, I'm under a little bit of pressure.  That whole raising a kid on my own thing and being 37 years old and my kid and I are still living with my parents because the economy is in the shitter and nobody wants to hire an old lady social worker thing.  I go nights without sleeping, or getting an hour or two of sleep.  And then my body pretty much shuts down and I sleep.  And I sleep.  And I sleep.  Last night the sleep stage of life began so it's 8:30 and I'm about to go to bed.  Yay!

But first I have to tell you about Henry's firsts this week.

Yesterday he insisted on walking on the treadmill.  Alone.  While it was on.  Of course I didn't let him do this, I stood behind him ready to catch him while ten million ways he could injure himself ran through my head.  But he didn't even stumble and he had a blast.  Laughed the whole time.

Yesterday he said "douche."  Bad bad mommy. 

Today he said "car."  Good mommy!

Today he learned to spin around and around and around until he got dizzy and fell down.  Laugh and repeat. 

Yesterday the tantrums began.  Two of them.  Before noon.  First, because he got caught playing in the cat's water and he got a stern talking to.  Second, because I made him leave the bathroom where he is only allowed to play in the bathtub, during bathtime.  I made him leave because he wasn't playing in the tub, he was opening drawers and pulling out random bathroom items, and it wasn't bathtime.  Oh.  The.  Drama. 

Today he played outside with his hero, er, his grandpa, for a looooong time while I watched baseball.  It wiped him out so tonight before bed we sat and cuddled on the couch and watched more baseball.  I explained some of the ins and outs of the game and it was wonderful.

I have so much to be thankful for and the list begins with Henry.   

this boy.

A few minutes ago Henry demanded a pacifier from the pacifier drawer.  He knows he only gets a pacifier when he goes to bed.  I handed it to him and he stuck it in his mouth.  He turned around and I said I guess it's time for a nap.  He went and found his blanket and then went to his bedroom, turned on his sound machine and waited for me to put him in his crib.

Sigh. 

I can't help it that I have the best kid ever.

Ways being a mommy has changed me:

• When bad shit happens to kids it really upsets me.
• I am a huge bitch to any person that hurt us or might hurt us.  Huge.  
• Insomnia has reached a completely new level that isn't good.
• The amount of love I have for this kid astounds me.  I didn't know it was possible.
• I have someone that really looks like me and not just because he looks Asian.
• I am shy and insecure and am pretty sure I'm doing it all wrong all the time.
• I clean.  All the time.  Picking up.  Dusting.  Washing.  Putting away.  Sorting.  Laundering.  Scrubbing again.  
• I buy purses based on whether or not a sippy cup, snack cup, a couple diapers and a Ziploc bag of butt wipes will fit.
• I skip articles in the New Yorker because holy shit, who has time for a weekly magazine full of words and no pictures??

Ways being a mommy has not changed me:

• Mario Impemba tweeted this today and I couldn't stop laughing: "Endy Chavez just took Verlander deep to start the game."

pressure. is. on.

I'm already getting emails asking why I haven't submitted my bracket.  Ummm.... because I have until noon on Thursday so I will be completing it at 11:59 a.m., bitches?!  Oh so stressful.

I think that is why I woke up with a killer migraine this morning.  I wanted to die.  And then I heard Henry's little singing voice on the monitor and I still wanted to die but I at least was happy to be alive.  We got up and I wondered how the hell I would drive to science class when I could hardly see and I was almost puking every time Henry yelled at the cats.  He yells at the cats a lot in the morning.  They pretend they don't like it but I suspect they don't mind because they're the ones that show up in his room first thing in the morning.  And if Henry cries before I get into his room to get him up, Barbaro Garbey paces the hallway and cries herself.  So annoying yet kind of adorable.  Mostly annoying. 

Anyway.

We made it to science class and had a blast.  We made slime!  Then after class we went to the play room for a while and then I made Henry leave because it was so nice outside and I wanted to explore the river walk with him.  He loved it but wanted to run after every biker, runner, and/or walker we came across and there were lots.  We decided to go grocery shopping and head home.  It was a good choice because then we played outside for a long time.  It was a little windy and kind of cold but Henry loves to be outside.  After his nap we went to the park and then came home and played outside some more.  When I tried to take him in, he did not want to go so we stayed outside for even longer. 

I love spring!  It was a little bit chilly with the wind so my mom stuck her hat on Henry thinking he would take it off right away.  He didn't and walked around looking goofy for a while and of course I took lots of photos and couldn't stop laughing.  Poor adorable sweet kid.

oh the stress.

My NCAA men's basketball bracket picks are due Thursday at noon.  I know nothing about any of the teams, including the U of M.  I think maybe tomorrow after science class Henry and I might come up with some sort of game outside to fill in my bracket.  That's about as scientific as it's going to get.

Yay, science class!  Yay, March Madness as long as I win some money but not that that is even an option because that's illegal I think and now that I'm a mom I don't do illegal shit no seriously I rarely even go faster than the posted speed limit at least not if Henry is in my car but sometimes when I'm in the D and Henry isn't I still run red lights and I.  Am.  Not.  Lying.

the sick.

Henry has been sick.  I have been sick.  I can't remember the last time he slept through the night.  I knew last night might be rough because of the time change but instead it was rough because of the sick.  He woke up at 5:30 a.m.  That's 4:30 a.m. pre-time change time.  Ridiculous.  After pulling all the tricks out of my go-back-to-sleep-it's-way-too-fucking-early trick bag and nothing worked, we got up at 6:30 and I wanted to cry.  I wouldn't let him take a nap until around 12:30 when he was pretty much falling asleep while walking across the kitchen.  Hopefully tonight will be better because we are both exhausted. 

The weather was beeeeeeeautiful today.  We spent lots of time outside.  Went for a bike ride, which was all fun and games until his foot got stuck somehow under his little bike and then he refused to get back on the bike which sucked because we were a quarter mile from home and he just wanted to cry and would only move if he was carried.  By me.  But once we got home he was fine running all over the yard and the neighbor's yard.  Especially once the neighbor came out and offered him a cookie.  Hell yeah he'll take a piece of cookie and then the next thing I knew he had eaten the whole damn thing.  They were really good cookies. 

I decided I would go to bed early tonight because it's really later than the clock says because of the time change you know.  And yes, I know that's wrong and that it's really earlier because of the time change but wtf I haven't slept in days and nights and I.  Need.  Sleep.

The sick.  Tomorrow we'll be better. 

bad day.

Henry has a cold.  He couldn't sleep last night so I spent much of it with him in the rocking chair.  As long as he was sitting somewhat upright he could breathe so we rocked and rocked and rocked.  I was freezing because everytime I tried to put a blanket over my shoulders or my legs, not anywhere near Henry, he got mad and pushed it off.  Seriously.  I would think he was finally asleep so I'd very stealthily pull the blanket back up and he'd very stealthily push it off.  He was in his sleep sack so he was nice and cozy and like I said, my blanket wasn't even touching him so it wasn't like he was too warm with it. 

We've pretty much ditched the morning nap but at 9:30 a.m. he practically climbed up on his dresser to grab his pacifier and he now knows that he only gets his pacifier at nap time and bed time.  I told him he could have it and he would have to take a nap and he didn't shake his head "no" (he doesn't say yes but if he doesn't want something he will shake his head no so I usually ask him questions and if I don't get a head shake, I assume it's a yes) so I got his blankie and laid him down and haven't heard from him since.

He was supposed to go out with his Gpa today.  They've been trying to go out and do guy stuff at least once a week.  I don't think he's going to get to go today unless he feels better.  I hope he feels better by tonight because I am exhausted. 

Ah sweet, sweet parenthood.  I love every minute of it.  Well, maybe not the snotty minutes.  It's still an honor and a privilege to be the one he runs to when he needs cuddles and being the one to make him feel better. 

the best day addendum.

So that last post was about the best day with Henry.  The best day without Henry includes eating family style starch lunch in an Amish buggy with two of the best friends one could ever have. 

Just wanted to clear that up. 

I would post a photo but I'm not sure my Amish lunch eating best friends would still be my Amish lunch eating best friends anymore. 

the best day.

I meant to write this post yesterday because it was the best day.  But then the best day slowly went downhill as I realized that I hadn't yet kicked the sickness and I came down with another round of fever and all the fun that brings with it.  I figured I would have tons of time to write something coherent since Henry was begging to go to bed at 4:30 p.m.  I didn't let him go to bed until 5, hoping he would stay in bed until at least 6 in the morning.  But shortly after he went to bed I started to feel like shit all over again.  I had spent much of Sunday in bed shivering and moaning and in paaaaaaiiiiin until I would have to run to the bathroom and have flu-like symptoms that I am positive you don't want to ever read about.  Ever. 

But back to the best day.

We went to Henry's second science class and it was a ton of fun.  The topic was push and pull so there were lots of activities with trucks and playing with modeling clay and more painting.  Henry isn't so into the painting.  Hopefully that will change because I already love his art projects.  He played with the kids and at one point he was handing blocks to another little boy so that little boy could build something.  So cute.  And then at the end he helped clean up, which hasn't been his strong suit in the past. 

He was tired for class but he stayed awake in the car on the way home with a little trick I like to call, "FOOD" (See?  I told you it's my fault he's on the big side!  But not to worry too much, his pediatrician assures me he is still healthy) (very healthy) (also, it was snack time anyway so it's not like I was feeding him just to keep him awake in the car) (Just mostly to keep him awake in the car).  Note to self:  put twice as many Cheerios in the snack cup as you think will be necessary because at least half of them will end up in the car where he can't reach them. 

We got home and since it was starting to warm up outside, I opened the sliding glass door so Henry could get out to the screened/glassed in porch.  I tried to help him over the door jamb which is uneven and full of tripping obstacles.  He didn't want my help.  I watched him figure out how to get outside and how to get back inside.  He did it over and over and over until he was a pro.  So proud!

He wanted to take a nap at 11:30 which is early but I figured science class tired him out so put him down.  My little champ slept for almost 2 hours!  Yay!

After naptime we put our light jackets on and went outside.  It was the first time Henry and I had gone exploring the back yard together and it was perfectly magical for both of us.  The wind was blowing and the birds were singing and the ground was muddy and the squirrels were yelling at us.  He stood and watched it all and then tried to mimic the crows and he tripped and fell and laughed and did it again and oh my god I didn't want it to end.  When he finally did reach for my hand to help him over a big tree root, I realized that his hands were freezing so we had to go inside. 

Just everything about the day was wonderful and I kept thinking that this is what I dreamed of when I found out I was a mommy.  It was perfect.

So then the early bed time.  He went to sleep just fine but shortly after that I realized he wasn't feeling well and was sniffling and coughing in bed.  He still sleeps with that damn pacifier in his mouth but when he's stuffed up, he obviously can't have it and he wakes up a lot and cries out. 

He still didn't feel great today but really wanted to go outside again so of course I took him out.  He walked down the street and in the neighbors' yards and just had a great time.  I had to run and catch him to bring him home or I'm sure he would have walked all the way down the street.  

I know, I'm sure this is boring for everyone but me.  But I just feel like I need to share the happy stuff and this, this is happy stuff.

Oh, and he actually stayed in bed until 7:15 this morning. 

i'm not gonna lie.

Henry is a big kid.  I'm sure it's my fault because well, isn't everything?  While I worry about his weight and that he is so big he isn't healthy, part of me wishes he would hurry up and grow so he can fit into his Public Enemy t-shirt that reads, "FIGHT THE POWER" on the back.

Kids are such fun!

can you say magnet.

That was the first question during today's science class.  Um.  Henry can't even say "no."  Wait, I take that back.  I know he can say it.  He just chooses to not say anything. 

We had a great time even though Henry really wanted to take a nap.  He almost fell asleep on the way to class.  So for as tired as he was, he did really well.  He mostly wanted to play in the big play table full of rice (uncooked, of course) and measuring cups and magnets and fun things to dig out with the magnets but he loved it so I didn't really care.  After much coaxing and hyping it up, I got him to go to another station to explore the magnets only to realize when we got there that he would be picking up things like nails and paper clips and small marbles with the magnets at that station.  It pretty much seemed like a one- to two-year old death trap station to me which is kind of odd because the class is only for one- to two-year olds.  Of course Henry was way into it.  I love watching him interact with other kids, those he knows or those he just met.  Some of the kids there were talkers and some weren't so it was nice that he wasn't the only one not answering the can you say magnet question.

I tried really hard to keep him awake on the car ride home but we were delayed when I got behind a very large man riding a very small mo-ped.  When we got behind him, he was going the speed limit, which at that point was 25 mph.  By the time we got to the top of the very gradual incline, we were barely pushing 10 mph and Henry was almost asleep no matter how loudly I sang Tom Sawyer.  He ended up falling asleep for about 10 minutes and when we got home he wanted to eat a snack and I tried to lay him down for a real nap but he had other ideas.  After many attempts to make him take a nap, I gave up and watched him walk around like a drunk zombie.  Running into walls.  One time I swear he fell asleep while licking the sliding glass door (I'm pretty sure he picked up that idea from Barbaro Garbey but I can't prove it).  During his last snack I explained to him that he was going to have to go to sleep and the next time I put him in his bed, he would have to cry until he went to sleep because I wasn't going to come get him, just like on Christmas eve.  When I put him to bed he went right to sleep, I didn't hear a peep.

It's been a long day.  I kind of wish tomorrow was science Tuesday as well.  But this time with more napping.

Oh, and I don't have any photos to post because they actually provide cameras for you to take your own photos and then they give you a disk at the end of the sessions.  It's a cool idea except my camera kicks their camera's ass but I didn't want to be the snob that declined using their piece of shit camera because mine is better.  But at least now I have a good excuse to not post photos when I'm super tired and just want to read my book and hopefully fall asleep for real tonight.

science tuesday.

Tomorrow is a big day for Henry and I.  We are going to attend our first Little Learners workshop at Impression 5. It's a five-week class and the topic for this series is Force and Motion Science.  This is the shit I looked forward to doing with my kid.  He's had a bit of a cough yesterday and today so I'm hoping he's not getting sick although I wouldn't be surprised if my little petri dish has yet another cold.  Anyway, I think this will be a great way for Henry to spend more time with little kids and maybe I'll meet some parents that I don't want to run away from.  We'll see.  We've been going to Impression 5 for a while now and I think there was only one time that I didn't have to physically keep my eyes from rolling at the other parents.  And then there was the time that the only mom that would speak to me had a hunch back and a mohawk.  And I thought her child was a girl but wasn't sure so stayed away from gender specific pronouns until she called him a boy.  What with all that matching tie dye and long, curly blond hair, I just couldn't tell.  And I could have sworn she was calling the child "Julie" only to realize HIS name was "Julian."  Man he was rockin' the tie dye.  Matching socks and everything.  I was really sad when I was leaving and told her I hoped to see her again sometime and she said that would only happen if her friend could get her more free passes and I was all, man that really sucks because admission is only $5.  I didn't say that out loud but I was thinking it because she was the only person that talked to me about Henry's blue balls and thought it was funny.  I wanted to see her again.  I thought about slipping her some cash but that would have been really creepy and she probably wouldn't talk to me again anyway.  I mean, I don't even know her name.  

Where was I?

Henry.  Science.  I think it's gonna be awesome and I'm so excited I seriously hope I can get some sleep tonight.  It looks like they allow photos so I'll try to take some and maybe someday I might even post some.

Yeah.  Don't hold your breath.  Sorry.

sippy cup war.

I bought Henry some new sippy cups because the ones he has been using are pretty baby-ish and he has chewed through them so the two holes in the sippy part turned into one big hole.  No big deal except for the waterfall of milk that came rushing out of them when he threw them at the cats.  So much for the spill proof thingy.  The new sippy cups have shorter spouts and are hard plastic instead of rubbery.  And they don't have little baby handles. 

Henry didn't want to have anything to do with them.  He threw them.  He yelled.  He refused to drink.  I tried to ease him into them and put the old tops on the new cups.  Nope.  Couldn't fool him.  After a few minutes of sippy cup drama, I would give in and give him his old goddamn sippy cup.   

This morning I decided I had had enough.  He could either drink out of the new sippy cup or he could get dehydrated.  And then I fed him waffle with peanut butter for breakfast.  At first he shook his head when I offered him the new sippy cup full of cold, wet, thirst quenching, mouth rinsing milk.  I just shrugged and said, "Okay.  Here, have some more peanut butter.  What?  What's that?  I can't understand you with all that peanut butter in your mouth..." 

After two more bites, he was begging for that brand spanking new sippy cup. 

Yes, I am more than slightly ashamed at being so proud of myself for outsmarting an almost-16-month-old and winning the sippy cup war. 

And Yes, I am mortified that I am so proud of myself that I'm sharing this with the internets. 

whew.

I definitely identify as a single parent.  With that said, Henry and I live with my parents and they help us out a lot.  I don't even realize how much they do until they go on vacation for two weeks.  At a time.  They're actually gone quite a bit but usually only for a few days or a week at the most.  This is the first time they left for two weeks.  At a time, since Henry has been bipedal. Before they left, I have to admit I was a little anxious.  Keeping a very active 15-month old occupied and happy while also taking care of the house and oh shit, I forgot to feed the cats, was sounding a little scary.  I didn't really forget to feed the cats.  They wouldn't let me.  With some careful planning, some visits from friends and to friends, and a pantry full of my favorite bloody mary mix, Zing Zang, and garlic stuffed olives and a freezer full of Stoli, we made it.   We survived.  No trips to the ER (neither of us).  Some tears (both of us).  One choking incident (him, I'm pretty sure he was storing goldfish crackers in his mouth for later and when he fell down for the millionth time, they shifted from his mouth to his throat.  and once dislodged, he swallowed them.  gross).  One death of Whitney Houston (so much sadder than I thought I'd be.  he didn't seem to give a shit).  Lots of laughter (both of us).  Learning to walk backward (him).

 

My parents got home today.  Tomorrow, the chances that I get to take a shit when I want to and without an audience are greatly increased. 

We survived.

i'm pretty sure henry's laughing at me.

I can't remember which well-baby appointment it was where the doctor asked if Henry was rolling over yet and I had to answer no but when we got home he started rolling over like a champ.  It was almost literally right when we got home.  Stinker.

This morning Henry had his 15-month well-baby appointment.  One of the questions was whether or not he is climbing on furniture or on other things to get to something he wants.  Nope.  Well, we got home and he took a nap and after he got up we were playing in the living room.  He was able to reach the ipod which surprised me and I wondered if he went through a growth spurt in the past couple days until I looked down and he was standing on one of his toys.  Then he fell off.  A little while later he stacked up a couple books to stand on to reach the ipod.  Then he fell off.  And then later he stood on his little car in order to reach the tv.  Then he fell off.  I almost called the dr.'s office to let them know that he is a stinker and next time I am not going to read the questionnaires out loud because they give him bad ideas. 

Climbing is bad.  Let's hope he/we survive this stage!

smh.

me:  Did I hear you say Carole is getting married?

my mom:  Yeah but I don't think we'll go to the wedding.  We went to her first wedding.  With the dead dove.

me:  What?

my mom:  I didn't tell you about that?  After the wedding they released a dove.  Except when they released it, it went in the air for a second then crashed to the ground.  I couldn't look but I think it was dead.

me:  That's not good.

my mom:  No.  I think everyone thought it was a bad omen but nobody wanted to say it out loud.  I guess we were right.  Or maybe the marriage didn't work because he was an ex-con she had met a few weeks before the wedding.  But a dead dove at your wedding is never a good thing.  

poor kitty.

I have a wonderful Happy New Year! post that I'm writing in my head but it might be another couple years before I actually find the time to sit down and write it out.  So for now, Happy New Year!

Here's a video of Henry and his "here kitty kitty" yell.  It is very easy to tell when a cat is nearby because he yells at them until they run away and hide.  They hide a lot.  Willie Horton is lucky because she can jump over the baby gate and escape to the basement.  Barbaro Garbey, not so much.  She has found a lovely hiding place in the back of the linen closet.  Henry usually knows when she is in there so he can yell at her but at least he can't reach her.  Yet. 

This video is short because he noticed the camera was on him and he is way more interested in any camera than the cat.  But just imagine this yelling going on for an entire afternoon.

Sigh.

Love.



I just noticed the house is a mess.  It's pretty much like this from 5 minutes after he wakes up (it usually takes that long for morning cuddles and then diaper change) until he goes to bed and I run around like a madwoman putting everything in it's place.