can you say magnet.

That was the first question during today's science class.  Um.  Henry can't even say "no."  Wait, I take that back.  I know he can say it.  He just chooses to not say anything. 

We had a great time even though Henry really wanted to take a nap.  He almost fell asleep on the way to class.  So for as tired as he was, he did really well.  He mostly wanted to play in the big play table full of rice (uncooked, of course) and measuring cups and magnets and fun things to dig out with the magnets but he loved it so I didn't really care.  After much coaxing and hyping it up, I got him to go to another station to explore the magnets only to realize when we got there that he would be picking up things like nails and paper clips and small marbles with the magnets at that station.  It pretty much seemed like a one- to two-year old death trap station to me which is kind of odd because the class is only for one- to two-year olds.  Of course Henry was way into it.  I love watching him interact with other kids, those he knows or those he just met.  Some of the kids there were talkers and some weren't so it was nice that he wasn't the only one not answering the can you say magnet question.

I tried really hard to keep him awake on the car ride home but we were delayed when I got behind a very large man riding a very small mo-ped.  When we got behind him, he was going the speed limit, which at that point was 25 mph.  By the time we got to the top of the very gradual incline, we were barely pushing 10 mph and Henry was almost asleep no matter how loudly I sang Tom Sawyer.  He ended up falling asleep for about 10 minutes and when we got home he wanted to eat a snack and I tried to lay him down for a real nap but he had other ideas.  After many attempts to make him take a nap, I gave up and watched him walk around like a drunk zombie.  Running into walls.  One time I swear he fell asleep while licking the sliding glass door (I'm pretty sure he picked up that idea from Barbaro Garbey but I can't prove it).  During his last snack I explained to him that he was going to have to go to sleep and the next time I put him in his bed, he would have to cry until he went to sleep because I wasn't going to come get him, just like on Christmas eve.  When I put him to bed he went right to sleep, I didn't hear a peep.

It's been a long day.  I kind of wish tomorrow was science Tuesday as well.  But this time with more napping.

Oh, and I don't have any photos to post because they actually provide cameras for you to take your own photos and then they give you a disk at the end of the sessions.  It's a cool idea except my camera kicks their camera's ass but I didn't want to be the snob that declined using their piece of shit camera because mine is better.  But at least now I have a good excuse to not post photos when I'm super tired and just want to read my book and hopefully fall asleep for real tonight.

science tuesday.

Tomorrow is a big day for Henry and I.  We are going to attend our first Little Learners workshop at Impression 5. It's a five-week class and the topic for this series is Force and Motion Science.  This is the shit I looked forward to doing with my kid.  He's had a bit of a cough yesterday and today so I'm hoping he's not getting sick although I wouldn't be surprised if my little petri dish has yet another cold.  Anyway, I think this will be a great way for Henry to spend more time with little kids and maybe I'll meet some parents that I don't want to run away from.  We'll see.  We've been going to Impression 5 for a while now and I think there was only one time that I didn't have to physically keep my eyes from rolling at the other parents.  And then there was the time that the only mom that would speak to me had a hunch back and a mohawk.  And I thought her child was a girl but wasn't sure so stayed away from gender specific pronouns until she called him a boy.  What with all that matching tie dye and long, curly blond hair, I just couldn't tell.  And I could have sworn she was calling the child "Julie" only to realize HIS name was "Julian."  Man he was rockin' the tie dye.  Matching socks and everything.  I was really sad when I was leaving and told her I hoped to see her again sometime and she said that would only happen if her friend could get her more free passes and I was all, man that really sucks because admission is only $5.  I didn't say that out loud but I was thinking it because she was the only person that talked to me about Henry's blue balls and thought it was funny.  I wanted to see her again.  I thought about slipping her some cash but that would have been really creepy and she probably wouldn't talk to me again anyway.  I mean, I don't even know her name.  

Where was I?

Henry.  Science.  I think it's gonna be awesome and I'm so excited I seriously hope I can get some sleep tonight.  It looks like they allow photos so I'll try to take some and maybe someday I might even post some.

Yeah.  Don't hold your breath.  Sorry.

sippy cup war.

I bought Henry some new sippy cups because the ones he has been using are pretty baby-ish and he has chewed through them so the two holes in the sippy part turned into one big hole.  No big deal except for the waterfall of milk that came rushing out of them when he threw them at the cats.  So much for the spill proof thingy.  The new sippy cups have shorter spouts and are hard plastic instead of rubbery.  And they don't have little baby handles. 

Henry didn't want to have anything to do with them.  He threw them.  He yelled.  He refused to drink.  I tried to ease him into them and put the old tops on the new cups.  Nope.  Couldn't fool him.  After a few minutes of sippy cup drama, I would give in and give him his old goddamn sippy cup.   

This morning I decided I had had enough.  He could either drink out of the new sippy cup or he could get dehydrated.  And then I fed him waffle with peanut butter for breakfast.  At first he shook his head when I offered him the new sippy cup full of cold, wet, thirst quenching, mouth rinsing milk.  I just shrugged and said, "Okay.  Here, have some more peanut butter.  What?  What's that?  I can't understand you with all that peanut butter in your mouth..." 

After two more bites, he was begging for that brand spanking new sippy cup. 

Yes, I am more than slightly ashamed at being so proud of myself for outsmarting an almost-16-month-old and winning the sippy cup war. 

And Yes, I am mortified that I am so proud of myself that I'm sharing this with the internets. 

whew.

I definitely identify as a single parent.  With that said, Henry and I live with my parents and they help us out a lot.  I don't even realize how much they do until they go on vacation for two weeks.  At a time.  They're actually gone quite a bit but usually only for a few days or a week at the most.  This is the first time they left for two weeks.  At a time, since Henry has been bipedal. Before they left, I have to admit I was a little anxious.  Keeping a very active 15-month old occupied and happy while also taking care of the house and oh shit, I forgot to feed the cats, was sounding a little scary.  I didn't really forget to feed the cats.  They wouldn't let me.  With some careful planning, some visits from friends and to friends, and a pantry full of my favorite bloody mary mix, Zing Zang, and garlic stuffed olives and a freezer full of Stoli, we made it.   We survived.  No trips to the ER (neither of us).  Some tears (both of us).  One choking incident (him, I'm pretty sure he was storing goldfish crackers in his mouth for later and when he fell down for the millionth time, they shifted from his mouth to his throat.  and once dislodged, he swallowed them.  gross).  One death of Whitney Houston (so much sadder than I thought I'd be.  he didn't seem to give a shit).  Lots of laughter (both of us).  Learning to walk backward (him).

 

My parents got home today.  Tomorrow, the chances that I get to take a shit when I want to and without an audience are greatly increased. 

We survived.

i'm pretty sure henry's laughing at me.

I can't remember which well-baby appointment it was where the doctor asked if Henry was rolling over yet and I had to answer no but when we got home he started rolling over like a champ.  It was almost literally right when we got home.  Stinker.

This morning Henry had his 15-month well-baby appointment.  One of the questions was whether or not he is climbing on furniture or on other things to get to something he wants.  Nope.  Well, we got home and he took a nap and after he got up we were playing in the living room.  He was able to reach the ipod which surprised me and I wondered if he went through a growth spurt in the past couple days until I looked down and he was standing on one of his toys.  Then he fell off.  A little while later he stacked up a couple books to stand on to reach the ipod.  Then he fell off.  And then later he stood on his little car in order to reach the tv.  Then he fell off.  I almost called the dr.'s office to let them know that he is a stinker and next time I am not going to read the questionnaires out loud because they give him bad ideas. 

Climbing is bad.  Let's hope he/we survive this stage!

smh.

me:  Did I hear you say Carole is getting married?

my mom:  Yeah but I don't think we'll go to the wedding.  We went to her first wedding.  With the dead dove.

me:  What?

my mom:  I didn't tell you about that?  After the wedding they released a dove.  Except when they released it, it went in the air for a second then crashed to the ground.  I couldn't look but I think it was dead.

me:  That's not good.

my mom:  No.  I think everyone thought it was a bad omen but nobody wanted to say it out loud.  I guess we were right.  Or maybe the marriage didn't work because he was an ex-con she had met a few weeks before the wedding.  But a dead dove at your wedding is never a good thing.